Mrs. Crazypants update

Turns out the powder is actually some sort of energy drink powder that she doesn’t bother diluting. So it’s a mainline jolt of sugar and caffeine. No wonder she always looks like she’s tweaking.

Here’s another tidbit I learned which made me give her some mental slack – she used to be a rodeo queen! She was wearing a wrist brace today and I asked her if she had carpal tunnel.

“No I wrecked my wrist by being swung around by it.”

“Jeez! How does that happen?”

“Well, when you get partially thrown off of a bull, horse or steer you’re still attached to the animal and essentially it’s dragging you around by your wrist.”

“WHUT? Are you telling me you were a Rodeo Queen??????”

“Only for five years.”

“OK, pics or this did not happen.”

Sure enough there was photographic evidence of Mrs. CP setting up to leave the chute, one of her swinging her lariat, and lots of photos of people in big hats.

She looked like she was much happier as a rodeo queen than she does as a call center flunkie, but then again who wouldn’t?

I got my Lamb’s Pride schwag bag and was rather disappointed. There was supposed to $100 of yarn and by my reckoning there was only $70. I sent a nice little email to DBNY to ask what they might have done with the rest of my order. I was also less than thrilled with the contents – 1 skein of bulky, 2 of worsted and 4 or 5 of cotton fleece. I’m not complaining about that to them however since it was a grab bag. The representative photo did show 2 skeins of bulky, however…

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Published in: on January 11, 2011 at 5:44 pm  Comments (2)  

Working for a living – sort of

I’m dedicating this post to my favorite sister Pam. After reading my blog her only comment was that there was a lot of knitting talk. A lot. So here you go Pam, here’s a little glimpse behind the knitting curtain.

I’ve been doing some work for Minneapolis Public Schools. It varies from updating and managing a website for an Arabic and Chinese language project, to warehouse work, to today’s task, taping some classroom sessions. Yes I’m sitting in class while the camera is running and writing to you.

Most of it has been interesting. Even the book packing job. I’ve been surprised and impressed by how far language learning techniques have come since I was taking French class in the 70’s.

One of the best things I came across was this series of easy Chinese readers. Best because I was impressed with the story topics. So far beyond “Il y a place libre ici?” and “Vamos a la playa,” these materials will keep a kid excited about learning a second language. Hooray for making learning fun!

Take this story for example. I took a photo of the front and back covers because I knew you wouldn’t believe me if I just told you. Behold what is being read in Minneapolis high school Chinese classes:

book cover
If this doesn’t keep kids reading, nothing will.

  Yep, that’s right. A story about conjoined twins. In Chinese, no less. Hell, I wanted to learn Chinese just to find out WTF was up with this book. Lucky for me the synopsis on the back cover was also in English:

I'm posting this full size so you can read the blurb. You're welcome.

 Really the synopsis doesn’t do the story justice. From what I could glean from the little bit of English used in footnotes to entice you to keep trying to get through this unholy tale, the parents were freaked out when the boys were born. I think the parents were considering giving them up for adoption, but someone convinced them that Siamese Twins were great! At the very least Mom and Dad got around the one child restriction imposed by the Chinese government AND they were boys! Bonus! So they took them home. Personally I don’t think the parents were completely sold on the idea – they didn’t even bother to give them actual names – they just called them Left and Right. Nonetheless, on with the story.

As you can imagine, all sorts of conjoined twin hijinks immediately ensued – dealing with bedtime arrangements, making special clothing for them to wear – you know, the usual, but every challenge was met with sunshine and good humor.

After establishing that their life was good and they were happy, something happened to bring everyone down. I’m not sure what it was because I don’t understand Chinese, but the boys met “An American Talent Scout” (I gleaned that tidbit from the list of characters at the front of the book), who for whatever reason was allowed to take the boys to America to meet some conjoined twin girls about their age who were somehow connected with the entertainment business. My husband thinks they were either specialty hookers or part of a circus sideshow. Or maybe both.

Anyway, somehow going to America with some sort of conjoined twins procurer solved their dilemna. I don’t think they returned home, so one can only assume Mom and Dad sold them into conjoined twins slavery, but apparently that was ok because Left and Right were all smiles at the end.

Who thought that packing school books could feed my hunger for the absurd? It just goes to show you that you can find ridiculousness anywhere as long as you keep a sharp eye out. Now that I think of it, I should have made a note of who ordered that story. That is the kind of person I want to hang out with.

OK, on with the knitting. I’m still working on that wretched baby blanket. I got an announcement from the mom – they had a little girl. How nice for them. They’re still getting a blue and green blanket. If they have gender-itis, they’ll just have to get over it. With only 38 more rows to go, every stitch is getting to be agony. I think I’ll have to do a number of hats to wash the hate out of my brain.

Published in: on May 4, 2010 at 10:04 pm  Comments (3)  

Productivity Increased – Somewhat

I’m back – post 2. I’m so proud. I don’t know if writing is an impeteus to get things done or vice versa. Who knows? Who cares?

Lunch with J & K today was lovely. I sent J to her new fetus of a website and we had a chance to talk about it. I also spoke my intent outloud: to practice life coaching on her and as I do a good job for her she will refer me to others. Her response? “Absolutely.” So I have that going for me.

Given what I did for the last 12 years at ACF, combined with people’s overwhelming need to tell me their darkest and craziest secrets, it seems that becoming a Life Coach would be a good fit for me. I’ve looked at certification – I might do that, or I might invent my own certification and offer to give it to others. Why would standards and practices I came up with be any less valid than one developed by someone else? Be the ball Wen.

I finished a pair of socks yesterday. They’re a bit big, but their purpose is to wear around the house, so I’m not so concerned about them rubbing around in my shoes when I’m walking. I have to admit to being a little disappointed about it though, after my “near perfect” blue socks, I thought I had turned a sizing corner, but I didn’t. Admitting to laziness would be good for my conscience right now – I knew they were going to be too big as I tried them on, but was too lazy to go back and do anything about it. Oh, and I ran out of yarn and had to buy another skein. That whole deal about buying in the same color lot? Totally true. I don’t know if anyone else would look closely enough to notice, but it’s pretty apparent to me.

Published in: on January 11, 2010 at 6:32 pm  Leave a Comment